I sat down to write a light, funny piece about Valentine’s Day and love and whatever else. And as I was just piecing it together in my head, an email appeared in my inbox from one of my very closest friends, who’s living abroad, saying that she had this morning been sexually assaulted.

While I immediately wrote her back, I didn’t really know what to say, or do. At Yale, on separate occasions, I was the first person two other close female friends told after they were date-raped. And I didn’t really know what to say or do then either, except to listen, and hug, and listen more.

But I can’t hug someone thousands of miles away. Without a telephone where she’s living, and only sporadic access to an internet cafe, I can’t even listen, and I can only occasionally read. I cannot possibly imagine how she feels right now, but I know I’m both terrified and enraged on her behalf.

It was because of my other two friends that I started teaching women’s self defense; because of this friend, I’ll be returning to doing so. There are far too many terrible things in this world for me to even begin to comprehend. And, at the same time, there is far too little love.

So remember that this Valentine’s Day: while we should never stop trying to rid the world of those terrible things, we should also never stop trying to fill it with more love.

Here’s wishing a safe, happy, love-filled Valentine’s Day to all of you out there in the ether,

josh